I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize