honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize