Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Stop everything. They have oreo straws to drink milk with and then you eat the straw. I think i just got turned on by a cookie commercial.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
I hereby state that I am over the age of 18. If I am not of age to purchase or consume alcohol products, I hereby acknowledge that I have not received any alcohol products from said party host. Also, in the event of injury or death, said party host is not to be held accountable. Please reply with your full name and today's date for your e-signature". *note: no text, no entry.*
Sorry bro, just a precaution. You know, ever since the "Jake incident". What a douche.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
