That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
Randomize
