Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
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