So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
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