Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
my liver is dry heaving
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
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