Sorry, I don't speak sober.
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Apparently I added "small children" to my likes on facebook. glad to know that's where my subconscious is at.
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
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