kristin has been a bad kristin
oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Woke up naked in another mans house. If that keeps happening, then I probably need to go gay. You know to make it ok.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
