omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
