i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
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