Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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