Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I've never seen the starbucks guy more terrified than when you dove out the car window after your credit card
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
My mom said she saw you at the bar last night and asked how you were. She said, you replied with, "Oh you know, just knocked up."
Figured I'd get right to the point
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
