"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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