Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
It's always nice when a total stranger hates your ex just as much as you think they should.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Randomize
