i just google imaged poop.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
A drank guy in the ER just sang Trouble to me and when he sang 'Lying on the cold hard ground' he threw himself onto the ground and landed on the wrist he'd just broken. Thirsty Thursday is weird already and it's not even 5.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Randomize
