I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
