talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
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