i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Just think about how many life skills I lack. Cooking... Driving... Sobriety...
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize