I am puke
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize
