So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Randomize
