Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
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