Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
