it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
Randomize
