Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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