My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
