when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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