Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
Randomize
