I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
Randomize