He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
