He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
