There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
Randomize
