He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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