There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Randomize