It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Text me some of your sweat
Randomize
