real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
