Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
