Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I'm really sorry I bit your mom last night, it was completely uncalled for.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
