i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I had a dream you and I were having sex. It was pretty romantic.... until you started pulling out toys.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
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