There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Randomize
