he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
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