Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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