This house was built for laser tag.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
