that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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