Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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