I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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