he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
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