Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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