There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
my mouth tastes like poor choices
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
