I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Randomize
